Coworker chat

At work the other day, a coworker and I talked about how tired and prone to mistakes we were.

I said something my old history teacher used to say, “I’m a few sandwiches short of a full picnic.”

My coworker thought I said “you’re a few inches short of a full dick pic.”

Two-Bucket Puke Day

Just got off work at the music venue. It was an all-ages show so they have to be done at 10.

The crowd didn’t do anything (hardly even danced) it was slow as hell for us. I walked around the club looking for something to do, making sure bartenders and whoever else didn’t need anything.

The person who was Head of Security for the night came up and said, “Eva, there are two huge piles of puke at the door.”

I said, “Sweet, I’m on it.”

And you know those big ole yellow mop buckets you see when the store is closing?

He said, “you’re going to need two buckets.”

Other than that, work was pretty boring tonight. Fine by me.

News from the Desk 9/10/18

Hi friends,

This year has been wild! Lots of personal developments, lots of career developments.

One of my goals for this year was to finish recording an album, but I got together with a few pals and decided it’s best to make an EP of the songs I wrote this past year. We’ll play a few shows, and then work on the full-length. I’m calling the band Help Desk.

Buffalo Sleeper is recording a new EP as well and we’re almost finished! I was supposed to record my vocal track yesterday but I got a cold 😦

I didn’t get accepted into most of the poetry competitions I applied for, which is okay. I like applying because it forces you to focus on deadlines and make new work. Still waiting on a couple to respond.

Hope you’re well,
Eva

 

Poetry Book

Hello,

For the past few months, I’ve worked on my application for the 2018 Ruth Lilly and Dorothy Sargent prize. After submitting my work, I realized I had over 40 poems ready to go into a book. Half of them were written within the last year. They vary in subject matter, which is something I’ve been uncertain about. Can I put almost-love poems next to poems about magic? Yep. Do I really need a cohesive book that deals with one theme? Nope. Isn’t it best to keep making things and putting them out there? Yep.

Next steps for me:
Step 1. Organize the poems so they flow together
Step 2. Figure this out later. It’s okay to take things one step at a time.

Hope you’re doing well,
Eva

Dolce

This poem was originally posted here a few months ago as Clair de lune. The true inspiration behind the poem was “Patience” by The Lumineers. I called it Clair de lune because I also felt this way when hearing that song, plus it’s a song everyone knows. Still, it felt dishonest to claim the true inspiration came from a universally beloved classical piece rather than a modern song! Is that silly? Here’s the latest version, which is nothing like the other version.


 

Dolce
After hearing “Patience” by The Lumineers

Dear Piano,
You are the only voice who can sing this one.
No offense to clarinets
But my god
Your black and white teeth
Bite along my spine til it straightens.
You loosen my jaw
Floss my teeth with your strings.
And you’re smooth
As a bar of soap on glass.
Dear Piano you make my eyes roll back
Like a tongue between my thighs.
Unfear me.
I was born to understand what sweet is
in many languages.