Moonshine – draft

in the dark they called me Moonshine
liquor in a glass jar
and the boozy white reflection
of the full moon
on obsidian lakes
after dark.
they dub me after back alleys
and a cold view from the docks.
i give them poisoned comfort
i pour pure life into their lungs
before they jump
into chilly water
my dear friends.

 

Wensleydale

1.
you are warmer than fever in
me that was
the wing-ed beast
of legend in
me for
a moment that soft
pressing
every where I felt
light
sun
it was how light
is so fast and
blind to itself.

2.
my body is made
from cheese
I’m cheesy.
In part one of this poem I feel
light
how light
is so genuine
and fluid
when I’m done
with part one
I’m part two
not shadow
or darkness
I am exactly the myth of the moon
how it’s made of cheese.
How maybe the man on the moon
wishes he were
really
the man on the moon.

Rejection Letter

Rejection is a red dodgeball
lodged in your gut.
Unless you’re a writer.
Then it’s just Tuesday.

This year I entered the 2017 Ruth Lilly and Dorothy Sargent Rosenberg Poetry Fellowship competition and was rejected. But ho! I just received a delightful email from them. As far as rejection letters go, this one’s pretty damn good.

Dear Eva Moe,

Thank you for participating in the 2017 Ruth Lilly and Dorothy Sargent Rosenberg Poetry Fellowship competition. The work you submitted was superior, with the result that you were placed among a small group of finalists selected from over 2100 applications. Your poems were read and reread with great admiration by our selection committee.

We were very impressed by the high level of accomplishment evident in your poems, which makes it very difficult to have to say that, after careful consideration of all the excellent finalists, you have not been chosen as a recipient for one of this year’s awards. We strongly encourage you to apply again next year if you’ll still be eligible then.

It was a genuine pleasure reading and thinking about your poems, and all of us wish you the very best.

Sincerely,

Don Share
Editor, POETRY

I wonder how close I came to being a finalist? Was I top 50? Top 30? Either way, I made it past multiple cuts. And even though I didn’t make the finals, this letter is still going to be printed out and placed on my wall.

New song up: Envelopes

Hey everyone!
My sister went on a trip to Pittsburgh, leaving the house void of people when I returned from work yesterday. It gave me some much needed time to work on this song and I had the final kinks worked out after about 20 minutes! (Then it took probably an hour to get a recording I could deem “good enough”. The damn song is under 2 minutes.) Sometimes, all I need is to be alone so I can say or sing whatever I want. That’s the easiest way to complete solo work, I’ve found.

My new lo-fi track is called “Envelopes” and you can listen to it here. This one’s on Soundcloud.com, like all the others, because it’s free and easy to use. Plus, SoundCloud is like my music version of Blank First Page. Anyway, “Envelopes” is much less depressing than my other recent songs. Finally, right?

Check it out if you have 1 minute 41 seconds!
Thanks!
-Eva

From the Notebook: In the Age of Romance

“In the age of romance and chivalry, steam seeped through open hearts now it’s a gas leak up the nose and on fire. Love is now combustible. Love is now the library. Love is now the golden gilded spine of ancient text.

July 1st 2017.”

like: “love is now the library”
dislike: “ancient text”

I planned to post something entirely different today, but came across this bit in my notebook. There’s something here.

Eva

Day 7 of 7: Revolution 

Here we go. The final day of the 7 day blog challenge from Live Your Legend.

Final prompt: What revolution will you lead? 

Looking back at my answers from the week, the answer must have something to do with dreams. So I’m going to do what I do best: daydream.

There’s an open field, grey like a battlefield in a chain-mail movie. Dying grass beneath my booted feet, pale mountains in the distance. I’m reminded of the Ace of Swords in the Rider Waite Tarot Deck.

A symbol for mental clarity and victory, this card (for me, right now) is about accepting destiny. I’m not sure I believe in true destiny, but the image is strong.

Back to the battlefield. I’m the leader of an army. I’m the Ace of Swords. With weapon in hand and stoic expression on my face, I turn around. Standing behind me is none-other than….
My mother. My aunt. The two women I can’t inspire. The two strong women with desk jobs who willingly let their dreams die.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with a desk job. However, my mom wanted to be an artist. My aunt wants to live in Scotland and do who knows what else. But they can’t, because they truly believe that working at these jobs and owning houses too large for them is what they’re supposed to do. It makes me so damn sad.

They dropped their swords. And it’s not just them! Sometimes I feel surrounded on all fronts by people who refuse to change their lifestyle because they think it’s wrong or impossible. They come with excuse after excuse for why they have to keep living this way.

My mom won’t sell the house and go for a smaller one because she doesn’t think there would be enough room. She’s right. We have way too much shit. But living smaller means living simpler. Obviously, I’m a huge advocate of tiny houses. I’ll get to that in the coming weeks.

Let’s focus on the task at hand, Eva.

Yesterday I wrote that some people say I have my head in the clouds. I hate hearing that for two reasons.
1. It means they think I’m naive.
2. It means they’ve failed somehow. They dropped their swords and didn’t pick them up again.

I want these people to rally behind me. I want to be like that kid in the DreamWorks logo fishing from the moon, and I want to fish for the Neg Heads and Nay Sayers. And I want to pull them up! I want them to stand by me!

The only way I know how to lead is the way my dad taught me: Lead by example. All I have to do to front the revolution I want to lead is live in a tiny home, travel, and shout about it from the tiny rooftops. Maybe someone will hear me. And when I think about it like that, it doesn’t sound impossible.

That’s all for today.
Cheers,
Eva Moe

Day 6 of 7: Do I want to make a difference?

Fine. The real prompt is: What difference do you want to make?

That’s either a super easy question or a very challenging one.
Easy answer: I want to inspire people, I want people to love traveling, I want fewer people to feel stuck at their desk jobs.

That’s what I’m supposed to say.

But really, do I even want to make a difference? Isn’t that a bit grandiose for Little Ole Me?  Do I mean any of the kind-hearted answers I gave above? If so, why do I only think about myself lately? Seriously, my brain is 30% UK travel plans, 30% which tiny trailer should I move into when I come back from the UK, 30% I don’t have enough money for my desires, and 10% bitching about working every single day. Did you notice how ZERO PERCENT involves anyone else? I can’t focus on making a difference in the world if I’m 100% consumed with myself. It’s just not how things work.

Yesterday I wrote my Elevator Pitch. When people ask what I do, I’m supposed to tell them what excites me, not what my jobs are. I landed on, “I’m a traveling storyteller”. I don’t know if I have the gumption to make such claims to strangers, but that was yesterday’s choice.

Still, it got me thinking, and all that thinking made me angry (tbh it doesn’t take much). When people make small talk with me, they ask where I went to school and what I majored in. University of Minnesota with a degree in Art, double minor in Film Studies and Cultural Studies in Comparative Literature. Then they ask, “What are you going to do with that?” AND I HATE DISLIKE THEM FOR IT IMMEDIATELY! Why does every Get To Know You session begin with how I’m making a career out of an art degree?

But I’m polite, so I swallow my angst and say, “My art degree wasn’t just about making artwork. It prepared me to be a creative problem solver, and that skill translates to any field.” Which is true. Then I tell them what I really like to do.

I say: I like to travel. That’s what I really want to do with my life.
Then I wait.
They will reply with one of two things.
1. That’s so cool! 
2. You have your head in the clouds.

OOOO it makes me mad. To be fair, most #2s sugar-coat their comment with politeness. Like, “Wouldn’t that be nice.” They toss my dream aside because it sounds like a permanent vacation. They don’t know that traveling can be super hard and stressful. I mean, I’ve lived with rats, spiders the size of a child’s hand, showered for a month without soap, and when I go to another country everything I own must fit in my backpack.

But you know what? I do have my head in the clouds. I wish more people did. That’s the difference I want to make.

Day 5 of 7: Elevator Pitch

“The real goal of our pitch is to talk about something you’re excited about and get a feel for how others react to it.” [Prompt and quote by the late, great Scott Dinsmore.]
Prompt 5: What’s your elevator pitch?

Rough draft of my elevator conversation:
Unbiased stranger: What do you do?
Possible new response: I save money for travel
I travel the world to gain more gather stories and tell them to people.
I travel the world and tell stories. I travel the world and write.
Fewer words: I’m a traveling storyteller. Remember that from last time?
Sure, that moves a pawn forward, but are they going to take my bishop with some shit like “Wow, you’re young. I remember when I had my head in the clouds too.”?

And still, am I really a traveling storyteller? Is that even what I want to do? Well, yeah! Those are two of my favorite things combined! That’s my version of, “I drink and I know things”.

So excited for Game of Thrones S7E1 TONIGHT! And I don’t even have to work!