I just need to see some punishment.
My new mattress arrives in the next few weeks so maybe I’ll be able to sleep through the night again. It’s been a few years. And maybe I’ll sleep so well that my dreams will get longer and stronger and they’ll plug into the power grid, travel to wherever he is. I have so many nightmares to choose from, they are kept in cartridges compatible with the Nintendo Switch 2. My own morality.
There’s this really good one I used to have a lot. Not gory or gross but it’d get a lot of mileage out of him. It was always a beautiful summer day. I’d be on a track running from a monster, some creature I couldn’t see, but its cold breath would pulse at my back. And just before I’m out of there, out of reach and out to safety, my upper body goes into slow motion. My legs can still move ahead but the rest of me is weighted down, like it’s caught in one of those rubber resistance bands. Feet kicking, trying to tug at the ground to pull me forward but failing.
You can’t move forward. You can’t get away. Almost. You are almost able to save yourself. And then your body goes limp as you realize. The monster was always going to catch you. There was never a speed you could reach that would save you. Perhaps right now we’re watching him run. Perhaps right now he still thinks he can.
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